The finale that surprised no one

Anya wins!

Really, who didn't see that one coming? More than a few of you called it from the first voting episode. From a seasonal perspective, she certainly deserves it. She has vision and a point of view and talent up the ying yang. But from my view of the runway? Meh. Oh she pulled it around at the last minute, for sure. But don't tell me you weren't at least a smidge underwhelmed. She showed 5 versions of basically the same dress, albeit beautifully. I was glad someone finally pointed out those dresses can be worn by only a fraction of the population. But you and I and Nina realize that there is more to Anya than flowy caftans. And frankly, I didn't love anyone's collection. So go ahead and give her the $100,000 and lets see what happens.

There was something to hate and love from everyone, so let's get down to business.

Josh

I still don't get why the judges love him so damn much. I also don't believe for a second that he can maintain an edited version of his aesthetic without the judges or Tim Gunn putting the squeeze on him. And I'm sorry, he did not persuade me to wear plastic or neoprene. I still love his jacket and would probably carry it around Macy's with me for an hour, but ultimately, I would put it back. Why? Because it's neoprene. It will be hot and I will sweat and no amount of clinical strength deodorant is going to make me less uncomfortable or pleasant to sit within sniffing distance. On the plus side, it might make me slightly more likely to try surfing if I could accessorize my wet suit with a snappy jacket to camouflage some, shall we say, extra curves. I will leave it to our two resident outdoor clothing manufacturer fantasy leaguers to get on that with a reminder that I'm also available for paid consulting.

Surprisingly, I really liked the florescent green skirt, but the same colored shorts were horrid. Ew. I feel blessed to never have to see his clothes ever again ever.

Kim

As stated previously, though unnecessarily by anyone who's met me, I am not Kim's urban street girl demographic. Still, three of my favorite pieces were hers. I absolutely adored her ivory outfit, found her gown stunning and irrationally loved the teal lamé dress (irrational but not unprecedented. I have mentioned my past gold lamé bathroom, have I not?). The woman knows her way around the shiny fabrics. That's a fact. I also would like to take this moment to take away Josh's "Most Improved" declaration from Nina and give it to Kim. She had some funky tailoring going on last week and yet these same pieces fit and draped beautifully on the runway. Plus, I like taking things away from Josh and giving them to people who aren't jerks. Could she have been classier or more appreciative when given the boot? No.

The rest of Kim's collection just wasn't my bag and I believe she needs a bit more time to refine her designs. I also pretty much hated the heavy black wedge shoes she chose for all the models. Too clunky for my taste. But I enjoyed her looks much more than I dreamed I would and am glad they gave her a runway shot.

Viktor

Oh Viktor, you did pretty much what I expected you to do. I believe what we have here is a man who can make impeccably tailored clothes in classic silhouettes but is limited in vision. Whenever Viktor tries to push it, he goes off the rails. I don't think this makes him a bad designer, but it does restrict his potential. Personally, I hope he embraces what he's got and creates his own commercial line. There's no disgrace in becoming a designer for the masses. Banana Republic sure isn't breaking trends or going broke. And I want that first dress. Like, now.

Anya

Is it wrong that my favorite dress was the one she was wearing? The last minute addition of black and white prints surely saved her collection, but I wish she could have pulled herself together earlier. I loved the new direction she was exploring in the last two challenges and would have liked to see more - or at least some - of that in the finale. Disappointment aside, she is clearly the best designer and deserved the win.

So there you have it. Thanks for joining me for another Project Runway season. Carry on.

It makes me want to weep

This post's title may be lifted from Mr. Gunn's critique of Josh's fabric but it pretty well sums up my thoughts on this season. I'm feeling not a little bit fatigued from the amount of manipulation the producers have put us through. But this latest switcheroo was the last straw. Three designers go to Fashion Week. THREE. Yes, the decision may be hard and some rules are made to be broken and all that. But you don't mess with the very premise of the show. Unless the producers' goal was to incite anger in longtime viewers and lady bloggers, in which case, bravo and well done.

The one tradition they decided to uphold was the "Dear lord, none of the collections are that good" teaser episode. It's almost not worth critiquing the clothes because the collections always end up magically different by the finale. But I'll give it a quick whirl.

I was disappointed in Viktor's pieces. That is, until the judges literally deconstructed them. I hope he decides to zip down that leather skirt and use it. I loved it when it was in his studio. The jacket, however, was a little too baubly for me.

Josh amazed me with his ability to actually dial it back a bit, even if his garments didn't. I did like the jacket and didn't even mind the hot pink pants that accompanied it. Not so amazing? His jerk-ass jerkiness. But fun seeing orange skin runs in the family.

I don't really get Kim's appeal. I definitely don't share her aesthetic. But I also find her work to always look a little unfinished, or at the very least, unpolished. That said, I really liked her gown. She knows her way around a sparkle (Josh, take note).

Sadly, Anya was thoroughly disappointing. I still feel like she is the best designer, but she did not bring it. The color palette didn't help matters, nor did the shoes. But she's been known to pull it together gorgeously at the last minute, so I half expect a completely new collection by Fashion Week.

This is it darlings. Let's do this.

I'm not driving you no more Miss Daisy

Take a look at the photos from Lifetime's Rate the Runway page and note the expressions on every single model. That is how I feel about the designs this episode. Much like the Sami people have over a hundred words for snow, I am currently up to 83 words for how boringly tragic these outfits are. Actually, I've really only bothered to think of the words boringly tragic. But if I had the inclination and five minutes, I'm sure I could think of at least 68.

Good for Anya for pulling it together and creating one of the few designs I liked. The other highlight being Viktor's pants and t-shirt. Burt's was fine, though not exactly win-worthy if you ask me. Of course, impediment numero uno for either of the winning designs ending up in my Piperlime cart is my aversion to going bra-less in public. But more power to you youngsters.

Now that we're getting down to the wire, I am at a total loss as to who will be going to Bryant Park. My money is on Viktor and Anya. But the third designer - and fourth fake-out? - is a total mystery to me. I don't disagree with the decision to send Anthony Ryan home, but it could have easily been any one of them. At this point, the remaining designers are completely hit or miss. But if I have to see an entire runway show of Joshua's crazy pants, I am going to need medication.